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The Blessed Mother, how is it that you love me so much, who am so unworthy?

I am the head of a household, living with my mother and two daughters. Since I was 5 years old, I had a severe headache, indigestion, and many other related illnesses. Even in my 30’s I was frequently throwing up, making people around me suspect that I might be pregnant. Before I found the Blessed Mother of Naju, my hands, feet and whole body were cold. In winter, my hands and feet became stiff, numb, and painful. There were pains all over my body. Life was so difficult for me.

One day in 1989, I went to the Blessed Mother’s House in Naju, but could not enter the Chapel, because there were so many people. I was among the people who were outside, participating in the prayer meeting by watching a TV screen. When the Blessed Mother’s messages were read and Julia gave her testimony, many people were repenting and crying. When I was praying, “Forgive this sinner,” Julia said, ‘Right now, someone who has pains in her stomach is being healed.’ It seemed that she was referring to me. Until that time, my stomach had been in a very weak condition and I had not been able to eat anything except some soup. I had had much pain in the stomach and had been frequently vomiting. A while later, the terrible pains in my head were gone and the pains in my stomach also disappeared. Since then, I was able to eat regular meals. My illness that could not be healed at hospitals was completely healed by the Lord through the Blessed Mother of Naju.

Since that time, I attended every First Saturday overnight prayer meeting in Naju. As I was trying to live according to the Blessed Mother’s messages, my life was turning into prayers. I was praying everywhere and always: while I was washing my face, in the bathroom, in the kitchen, etc.

As the head of the household of four people, I sold items in a mobile store (pushcart) in streets. It was not easy especially for a weak person like me. Sometimes, I heard insulting words and even were beaten. One day, I had a dream. I saw the weeping Blessed Mother of Naju. Her image was always with me. When I woke up, I found myself in a hospital bed. I realized that I was not sleeping but, had collapsed eight days before at home. A woman in the neighborhood brought me to the Maryknoll hospital. It was hard to believe, but it was real. I incurred damages in my arteries and brains. The hospital staff first thought that I was dead. When I regained consciousness, they said that I needed a surgery. However, the cost of the surgery would be 20-30 mil. Won (about US$20,000 to 30,000), which was an impossible amount for my family. I thought that I would be better off by going to the bosom of the Blessed Mother.

Then, a woman by the name of Angela Lim, who had received many graces in Naju and was leading a happy life, came and told me, “If you don’t want the surgery, run away hurriedly to the Blessed Mother of Naju.” She asked me to have a complete trust in the Blessed Mother of Naju. When there was darkness only without any hope, her words gave me a hope. My heart was beating hard. When I told the doctor about the Lord and the Blessed Mother, he tried to avoid me saying, “I don’t want to talk to you.” Angela Lim raised some money enabling me to be discharged from the hospital. The hospital staff thought that I was out of my mind because of the bleeding in brains.

The next day, which was a Thursday, I went to Naju together with my first daughter and Angela Lim despite the terrible pains in my head. Because it was a Thursday, there was a Holy Hour prayer meeting in the evening in Naju, which was held to offer up reparations for the offenses committed against the Lord. During the prayer meeting, Julia suddenly collapsed. When she came to, she said that she fell because of a severe pain in her head. She asked me if I had pains in my head. I was so surprised. I began crying, because I realized that Julia was suffering pains in my place. “The Blessed Mother, how is it that you love me so much, who am so unworthy? I am a terrible sinner and have not done anything for the Lord. But you rescued me from death. The Blessed Mother whom I saw during my unconsciousness must have been the Blessed Mother who is living in Naju. With your tears, you saved this sinner. Thank you, Mother.” Warm tears continued flowing down on my face. My head became healthier and I was able to eat meals. It was December 13, 1992.

I was again attending the First Saturday prayer meeting in January, 1993. I was shedding tears of repentance before the Blessed Mother’s weeping statue. Suddenly, I remembered my past clearly. I remembered many things which I had completely forgotten about. I realized how great a sinner I had been. Many things which I did not think of as big mistakes were pounding on my conscience. When Julia said, ‘Even when a rock rolled down by itself and hit and hurt my foot, it was my fault because I was there,’ I was repenting many things that I had done. Now, the Blessed Mother of Naju converted me by shedding tears of blood and also exuding fragrant oil and enabled me to approach the Lord. She also healed me through Julia’s suffering. I was so grateful. I now live in joy, love, and peace. There is nothing I need to fear. ‘Lord and the Blessed Mother! I cannot describe how grateful I am to you for saving me from the road to hell, when I was on the verge of dying. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.’

There are many miracles in Naju, because the Blessed Mother is so filled with love. The Lord and the Blessed Mother have chosen Julia to suffer for the conversion of many souls including me. I pray that Naju will be approved soon and the Blessed Mother’s triumph will be accomplished. I pray in the name of Our Lord Jesus Christ through the Blessed Mother of Naju.

— Helena Mikangja Kim, Aeri Apts. #203, 40 7/3 Bosu 1-ka, Chung-ku, Pusan, October 12, 1994

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